I Am the One They Waited For: Claiming Your Power to Break Cycles

You ever get that moment of realization—like out of nowhere, it hits you—that you are the one who gets to break the patterns no one else dared to touch? That’s where I found myself. I used to think life just… happened to me. That the mess I grew up in, the silence I carried, the weight of all those unspoken rules—that was just “how things are.” But one day I woke up and thought: Nah. Not anymore. This story ends different with me.

And that’s where this blog starts. Because if you’re reading this, I have a feeling you’re on the same wave. You’re tired of repeating patterns that don’t fit you. You’re ready to take the reins and claim your power.

Let me tell you what that journey’s been like for me—and maybe it’ll give you a mirror for your own.

The Echoes We Inherit

When I was younger, I didn’t question much. The yelling behind closed doors, the secrets swept under rugs, the way everyone just accepted pain as “normal.” I thought all families moved through life like this—fragile, unspoken agreements that no one even tried to challenge.

But the thing about cycles is they’re sneaky. They slip into your habits, your relationships, even your self-talk. They whisper, “This is all you’ll ever know.” And for a long time, I listened. I thought if my parents or grandparents couldn’t break free, what chance did I have?

That’s the lie cycles tell us: that we’re trapped in them.

But the truth? Someone always has to be first.

The Shift

It wasn’t dramatic. I didn’t wake up to fireworks or an epiphany with background music. It was smaller than that—more ordinary. I remember sitting in my room, feeling heavy after yet another night of “just one drink” turning into too many. I felt exhausted from chasing approval, drained from silencing my own needs just to keep the peace.

And it clicked.

If I didn’t stop, this wasn’t just my life—it would ripple out into the people around me, and maybe even the ones who come after me. My choices could either be the chain that keeps dragging us down… or the hammer that finally shatters it.

That realization was both terrifying and freeing.

The Weight of “First"

Here’s the thing no one tells you about being the cycle-breaker: it’s lonely. People get uncomfortable when you start changing the script. They’ll say you’re acting “different” (even though that’s the point). They’ll guilt you, tease you, or try to pull you back into the old ways because your growth shines a light on their stuck places.

I won’t lie—it hurt. I lost friendships. I felt distance from family members who didn’t understand why I was choosing sobriety, or why I stopped people-pleasing, or why I suddenly had the nerve to set boundaries.

But I realized something: being the “first” doesn’t mean being the “only.” It means you’re creating the path. You’re building something that others will follow, even if they can’t see it yet.

And the loneliness? It taught me how to stand on my own two feet, not leaning on the approval of people who didn’t want to see me grow.

Mistakes Still Happen

Let’s get real here—I didn’t become some perfect, enlightened guru overnight. Far from it. I still made mistakes. I still snapped when I was overwhelmed, said yes when I should’ve said no, or slid back into old habits that felt familiar.

But the difference is, I stopped letting mistakes define me. Instead of spiraling into shame, I started owning them.

That’s the adult part no one talks about. Being brave enough to say, “Yeah, I messed up—but I’m going to fix it. I’m going to learn from it.” Because when you’re breaking cycles, the goal isn’t perfection. It’s progress.

Every time I picked myself back up, I was rewriting the story. Showing myself that falling doesn’t mean failing—it just means you’re still in the fight.

The Freedom of Saying “No More”

Here’s the best part about claiming your power: freedom. The moment you decide this ends with me is the same moment you free yourself from being defined by your past.

It doesn’t mean you pretend it didn’t happen. It doesn’t mean you ignore the scars or silence the memories. It means you choose to carry them differently. Instead of shackles, they become lessons. Instead of weight, they become wings.

For me, it looked like this:

Choosing water instead of liquor, even when everyone else raised a glass.

Choosing rest instead of running myself ragged to keep everyone happy.

Choosing honesty, even when it made people uncomfortable.

And each choice built a new pattern. One that felt lighter. One that felt like me.

Why “I Am the One They Waited For”

You ever hear that old saying, “We are our ancestors’ wildest dreams”? It gives me chills every time. Because I think about the ones who came before me—who maybe wanted to break free but couldn’t. Who maybe whispered to themselves late at night, “I wish this could be different.”

Well, guess what? We are their different.

When I say, I am the one they waited for, I mean it with my whole chest. I mean I’m the one who finally had the courage to say, “This cycle stops here.” I mean I’m building a life that would’ve seemed impossible to them.

And you? You can be that one too.

A New Legacy

Here’s what I hold onto on the hard days: I’m not just breaking cycles for me. I’m building something new for the ones who come after. Whether that’s kids, nieces, nephews, or even just the people who cross paths with me and see it’s possible to live free.

My sobriety, my boundaries, my healing—they’re not just mine. They ripple outward. They shift the atmosphere. They say to anyone watching, “Hey, you don’t have to stay stuck either.”

That’s legacy. And it starts the moment you decide to claim your power.

Final Thought

So, friend, if you’re in the thick of it—feeling the weight of being the “first,” doubting if you’re strong enough, scared of losing people—let me remind you:

You are strong enough.

You are the one.

You are the breaker of chains.

And one day, someone down the line is going to look back and whisper a thank you for the choices you made.

Until then, hold your head up high and remind yourself daily:

I am the one they waited for.🌹⛓💥